Don't Touch the White Woman!

A group of holidaymakers head for the Spanish resort of Elsbels for a 4-day visit. When they get there, they find the Hotel still hasn't been finished being built, and the weather is awful. And there is something strange about the staff—they all look very similar. To top it all off, the weather seems to be having an adverse affect on the Hotel's foundations.

Professors Vrooshka and Crump decide to visit an archaeological site to study the artifacts there. Lo and behold, it's right next to a caravan site where all manner of people are staying. With a randy Major owning the site, a snobbish mother, and the two professors' constant innuendos, the story ends with a sinking caravan site and a striptease performance as a replacement for the cabaret night.

Sid and Bernie keep having their amorous intentions snubbed by their girlfriends Joan and Anthea, so when they decide to take them on a holiday to Paradise Camp, they think they're off to a nudist colony—but they couldn't be more wrong, and meet up with the weirdest bunch of campers you can imagine.

An accountant who is creative with his firm's books uses the money to fund a romantic spree.

Bertram Oliphant 'Bo' West wants to clear his unjustly smeared reputation, so he joins the Foreign Legion—with Simpson his manservant in tow. But the fort they get posted to is full of eccentric legionnaires, and there's trouble brewing with the locals too. Unbeknown to Bo, his lady love has followed him in disguise.

Henry VIII has just married Marie of Normandy, and is eager to consummate their marriage. Unfortunately for Henry, she is always eating garlic, and refuses to stop. Deciding to get rid of her in his usual manner, Henry has to find some way of doing it without provoking war with Marie's cousin, the King of France. Perhaps if she had an affair...

A gang of thieves plan to make their fortune by stealing a shipment of contraceptive pills from Finisham maternity hospital. They assume disguises and infiltrate the hospital, but everything doesn't go according to plan. The hypochondriac consultant Sir Bernard Cutting, Matron and the doctors and nurses at Finisham have a habit of getting in the way.

It's time for Robert and his team to make their mark on the music scene. Or maybe it's 40 years too late. In Nashville you play for free so you might get found. This surreal musical comedy follows Robert, his manager (ex girlfriend), roommate/drummer, and driver (bass player) as they work through the highs and lows of a life in music.

Brian and Charlie work for a gangster. When the boss learns they want to "leave" he sets them up to be killed, after they help rob the local Triads of their drug dealing profits. Brian and Charlie decides to steal the money for themselves, but when their escape doesn't go to plan, they have to seek refuge in a Nuns' teacher training school.

During World War II, two French civilians and a downed British Bomber Crew set out from Paris to cross the demarcation line between Nazi-occupied Northern France and the South. From there they will be able to escape to England. First, they must avoid German troops – and the consequences of their own blunders.

Kit Cardigan seeks the killer of his father...among other plot threads leading up to the famous historical incident.

Jack Crabb, looking back from extreme old age, tells of his life being raised by Indians and fighting with General Custer.

A young man gets engaged to a business competitor's daughter.

A lowly pencil pusher working for MI7, Johnny English is suddenly promoted to super spy after Agent One is assassinated and every other agent is blown up at his funeral. When a billionaire entrepreneur sponsors the exhibition of the Crown Jewels—and the valuable gems disappear on the opening night and on English's watch—the newly-designated agent must jump into action to find the thief and recover the missing gems.

The unruly schoolgirls of St Trinian's are more interested in men and mischief than homework and hockey. But greater trouble than ever beckons when the arrival at the school of Princess Fatima of Makyad coincides with the return of recently expelled Arabella Fritton, who has the kidnap of a prize racehorse on her mind. The first film in the classic comedy series.

Honey Skinner is proud of her successful husband. When he tells her he's going to ask for a raise, she knows he'll get it. He asks his boss just as their big client announces he's not renewing his contract. He doesn't get the raise, but he's too embarrassed to tell his wife the truth. She starts making plans to spend that extra $10 a week; the first thing is a new dress suit for him and a new outfit for her so they can fit in at a swanky party. They're the hit of the party, and Honey is embraced by the 'smart set.' Meanwhile, business is bad and Skinner loses his job. The tailor is after him for payment on the suit, and Honey is still spending the salary he doesn't have.

The misfortunes that befall three dental students when they become unwitting accessories to a burglary.

In 1962 New York City, love blossoms between a playboy journalist and a feminist advice author.

With the occasion all but overshadowed by her sister's upcoming wedding, angst-ridden Samantha faces her 16th birthday with typical adolescent dread. Samantha pines for studly older boy Jake, but worries that her chastity will be a turnoff for the popular senior. Meanwhile, she must constantly rebuff the affections of nerdy Ted, who is unfortunately the only boy in school who seems to take an interest in her.

During harvest festival at a collective farm, a visiting dance troupe reunites a ballerina with her childhood friend Zina. In order to teach her unfaithful husband a lesson, Zina, the ballerina, and the ballerina’s husband decide to swap roles for the evening… Alexei Ratmansky invokes the genius of Shostakovich’s score at the Bolshoi, creating a laugh-out-loud masterpiece with its bits of slapstick comedy, hilarious deceptions, false identities including Principal Dancer Ruslan Skvortsov dressed as a Sylph and its many colorful characters! The Bolshoi bursts with vivid life and bright spirits in Ratmansky’s brilliantly choreographed smash. Captured live on Apr 29, 2012.