Damn You, Love!

Cabbie-turned-chauffeur Jimmy Tong learns there is really only one rule when you work for playboy millionaire Clark Devlin : Never touch Devlin's prized tuxedo. But when Devlin is temporarily put out of commission in an explosive accident, Jimmy puts on the tux and soon discovers that this extraordinary suit may be more black belt than black tie. Paired with a partner as inexperienced as he is, Jimmy becomes an unwitting secret agent.

On a bet, a gridiron hero at John Hughes High School sets out to turn a bespectacled plain Jane into a beautiful and popular prom queen in this outrageous send-up of the teen movies of the 1980s and '90s.

Deathly ill Count Dracula and his slimy underling, Anton, travel to Italy in search of a virgin's blood. They're welcomed at the crumbling estate of indebted Marchese Di Fiore, who's desperate to marry off his daughters to rich suitors. But there, instead of pure women, the count encounters incestuous lesbians with vile blood and Marxist manservant Mario, who's suspicious of the aristocratic Dracula.

Left behind by her friends on a boat trip, contemporary teen Mabel takes pursuit but is knocked unconscious on an island, where she has a dream involving pirates, sisters, a modern major-general, romance, and adventure.

A recovered VHS tape that still holds the home video recording of A Cheesy Christmas, a romantic comedy that first premiered in 1994 on channel RDZ! Still has the ads, but what a nostalgic time. A family friendly stand alone film that can work as a companion piece to the horror, Curtains for Christmas.

A pathologist experiments with a deaf-mute woman who is unable to scream to prove that humans die of fright due to an organism he names The Tingler that lives within each person on the spinal cord and is suppressed only when people scream when scared.

This hilariously smart satire tells the story of Johnny Vince, a swingin' hepcat who meets hitman Sam and Harvey on a road trip to pull a "botched robbery" in Las Vegas. Along the way they take a deeply unfulfilled not-so-good-girl hostage, encounter the mysterious Mechanic, get harassed by a foul-mouthed answering machine... and did we mention the lesbians? The result - hilarity ensues!

A newsman works with a blind puzzle-solver to uncover a deadly conspiracy linked to a genetic research facility.

From Richard Gale, mad maker of CRITICIZED, comes a film that will never have you looking at cutlery the same way again. Set-up as an epic-length trailer for an upcoming release, HORRIBLY SLOW... depicts a man's endless pursuit by what has got to be one of the most determined and patient murderers the screen has ever seen.

An all-singing, all-dancing, star-spangled musical leap around the biblical story of the Nativity, set in 1972. With a comic twist, this familiar story is brought to life through the eyes of the innkeeper. Despairing after a bad year, he contemplates suicide but his attempt is stalled by a voice from above who points out that King Herod is coming to town.

A couple of slackers find an antique dagger and manage to free the gorgeous female warrior that was imprisoned in it by an evil spell. An evil sorcerer is not happy by this turn of events and determines to possess both the blade and the warrior through a sacrificial ceremony. The two heroes manage to rescue the damsel in distress and defeat the wizard and his minions by employing skills mastered through hours of video game play.

Urged on by his wife and daughter and against his better judgment, Texas cattle-baron Maverick Brander, finds himself in Washington D. C. as an elected congressman. However, when the Brander family arrives in Washington, they are met at every junction by snobbery and ridicule. Then an investigative committee arrives from Texas to check up on how Maverick is representing their interests.

A group of self-absorbed actors set out to make the most expensive war film ever. After ballooning costs force the studio to cancel the movie, the frustrated director refuses to stop shooting, leading his cast into the jungles of Southeast Asia, where they encounter real bad guys.

Affluent and arrogant businessman Goddard Bolt, feuding with rival Vance Crasswell over a land deal, makes a bet with Crasswell that he has the wits and street smarts to live penniless and anonymous on the rough streets of Los Angeles for thirty days. But Bolt has a rude awakening when the reality of homelessness hits him. Still, he finds a silver lining in a burgeoning romance with Molly, a former Broadway dancer who has fallen on hard times.

The heroic Leonidas, armed with nothing but leather underwear and a cape, leads a ragtag group of thirteen Spartans to defend their homeland against the invading Persians (whose ranks include Ghost Rider, Rocky Balboa, the Transformers, and a hunchbacked Paris Hilton). No one is safe when the Spartans take on the biggest icons in pop culture!

After several Catholic school pupils are murdered, a teacher who is having an affair with one of his students becomes a suspect. When other gruesome murders start occurring shortly thereafter, the teacher suspects that he may be the cause of them.

Dan is a former geisha, now working as an ace pilot for the Earth Defense Troops. Her fiance was killed by the space monster Bemurasu which consumes nuclear waste. To save Planet Earth, Dan attacks Bemurasu, but whenever she does, she feels ecstasy. Can she save Planet Earth?

Robin Hood comes home after fighting in the Crusades to learn that the noble King Richard is in exile and that the despotic King John now rules England, with the help of the Sheriff of Rottingham. Robin Hood assembles a band of fellow patriots to do battle with King John and the Sheriff.

A devout Mormon living in L.A. becomes a pornographic actor after his martial arts moves impress a big-time director.

Abahachi, Chief of the Apache Indians, and his blood brother Ranger maintain peace and justice in the Wild West. One day, Abahachi needs to take up a credit from the Shoshone Indians to finance his tribe's new saloon. Unfortunately Santa Maria, who sold the saloon, betrays Abahachi, takes the money and leaves. Soon, the Shoshones are on the warpath to get their money back, and Abahachi is forced to organize it quickly.