Quiet, Please

In this biting satire of the film industry, an undiscovered actor will do anything to become the next 'Asian leading man' - other than go to therapy.

Revolves around Castro, who was once a very famous TV host, but as he grows old, his popularity is dwindling.

Two vaudeville performers fall in love, but find their relationship tested by the arrival of WWI.

Gaby and Fred are preparing for the world swimming championships which will be held in Quebec City this year. Their love will be put to the test when a former love of Gaby's turns up at the championships. Gaby finds herself at a crucial point of her life where she has to choose whether to continue competing or follow another dream that she's cherished forever, but which seems impossible to everyone else—her dream to become an astronaut.

A movie producer who made a huge flop tries to salvage his career by revamping his film as an erotic production, where its family-friendly star takes her top off.

Five Green Berets stationed in Vietnam in 1968 grudgingly undertake the mission of a lifetime -- to secretly transport an 8,000-pound elephant through 200 miles of rough jungle terrain. High jinks prevail when Capt. Sam Cahill promises the Montagnard villagers of Dak Nhe that he'll replace their prized elephant in time for an important ritual. But for Capt. T.C. Doyle, the mission becomes a jumbo-sized headache!

A young director intent on making "the greatest color crime movie ever" can't seem to finish his script--he has a beginning and an end, but he can't quite figure out the middle. The daughter of his landlord, excited to have a real "movie person" living nearby, tries to help by putting him in touch with a man who wants to collaborate on a script--the strange "Dr. Jolly"

Local councillor Sidney Fiddler persuades the Mayor to help improve the image of their rundown seaside town by holding a beauty contest. But formidable Councillor Prodworthy, head of the local women's liberation movement, has other ideas. It's open warfare as the women's lib attempt to sabotage the contest.

Captain Crowther's lot is not a happy one! Five of his crew have to be replaced and at such short notice before the voyage begins there isn't much to choose from. Not only does he get the five most incompetent shipmates ever to sail the seven seas, but the passengers turn out to be a rather strange bunch too. The SS Happy Wanderer will never be the same.

Dick Turpin is terrorising the countryside around Upper Dencher. Captain Fancey and Sergeant Jock Strapp plan to put an end to his escapades, and enlist the help of the Reverend Flasher. Little do they know that the priest leads a double life. Then Madame Desiree and her "Birds of Paradise" arrive in the village...

Set in 1973 Spain, a struggling encyclopedia salesman and his wife take advantage of an offer to make adult films. The act turns him into an aspring legit filmmaker and her into an international sex symbol.

Toby, a cynical film director finds himself trapped in the outrageous delusions of an old Spanish shoe-maker who believes himself to be Don Quixote. In the course of their comic and increasingly surreal adventures, Toby is forced to confront the tragic repercussions of a film he made in his idealistic youth.

Seeking a divorce from her absentee husband, Mimi Glossop travels to an English seaside resort. There she falls in love with dancer Guy Holden, whom she later mistakes for the corespondent her lawyer hired.

Never Give a Sucker an Even Break is a 1941 film about a man who wants to sell a film story to Esoteric Studios. On the way he gets insulted by little boys, beaten up for ogling a woman, and abused by a waitress. W. C. Fields' last starring role in a feature-length film.

A rich but racist man is dying and hatches an elaborate scheme for transplanting his head onto another man's body. His health deteriorates rapidly, and doctors are forced to transplant his head onto the only available candidate: a black man from death row.

A renowned Mexican journalist and documentary filmmaker living in Los Angeles, after being named the recipient of a prestigious international award, is compelled to return to his native country, unaware that this simple trip will push him to an existential limit.

John Von Kubrick, an eccentric director, goes off the rails with all the footage of his freshly shot feature. His two producers find themselves in a serious predicament, having borrowed money from the Japanese mafia to finance the project. Now, they are obligated to track down the director and the film at all costs. It's a matter of life or death..

A pair of witches descend upon a family and wreak havoc. Now it's up to the family's matriarch, a private detective, and a suspended police officer to stop them.

Playboy Teddy Ward wants to marry Jeannie King, an artist, but his father wants him to marry Loris Lane, but tells Teddy he can marry whom he pleases if he will make the Mountain Inn a profitable operation. Teddy agrees, and with the support of his friends arranges an ice-boat race with a $10,000 prize to the winner. A problem arises when his father refuses to pay such an amount. Teddy thinks one of his friends will win the race and refuse the prize, but champion racer "Duke" Slade shows up and Teddy knows he will take the money. Some movie stars show up and, while using their own names, are definitely not playing "Self" in this fictional film.

Kindhearted Griffin Keyes is one of the best-loved caretakers at the Franklin Park Zoo, but he's more comfortable with the animals than with females of his own species as proven by his failed marriage proposal to the self-absorbed Stephanie several years ago. The animals have listened to Griffin pine over her for years and, after she reappears in his life, they decide to help Griffin rekindle the relationship and become the alpha male she wants him to be. They inadvertently reveal their secret ability to talk and, after Griffin's initial shock, teach him the rules of courtship, animal-style. Surprisingly, the animals' advice really works and Griffin is about to get everything he's ever dreamed of--or is he?