Quiet, Please

When a group of trespassing seniors swim in a pool containing alien cocoons, they find themselves energized with youthful vigor.

During the holiday season, when the animals of the Central Park Zoo are preparing for Christmas, Private, the youngest of the penguins notices that the Polar Bear is all alone. Assured that nobody should have to spend Christmas alone, Private goes into the city for some last-minute Christmas shopping. Along the way, he gets stuffed into a stocking

An unhinged office worker who planned to go on a shooting spree at his workplace struggles with his newfound status as a hero after he ends up stopping a shooting spree instead.

Former detective Brenner has become an ambulance driver and finds himself, much to his dismay, caught up in a war between two rival first aid organizations.

Deep in the African jungle, a baby named George, the sole survivor of a plane crash, is raised by gorillas. George grows up to be a buff and lovable klutz who has a rainforest full of animal friends: Tookie, his big-beaked toucan messenger; Ape, a witty talking gorilla; and Shep, a peanut-loving pooch of an elephant. But when poachers mess with George's pals, the King of Swing swings into action.

A young woman is catapulted into pop stardom, with her already-famous DJ boyfriend calling the shots.

In 1962 New York City, love blossoms between a playboy journalist and a feminist advice author.

An honors graduate in literature, Wyman is stuck writing cheap erotic fiction, but somehow ends up starring in an AV film. Suddenly a porn superstar in Japan, he discovers a whole new world fraught with pleasure, pain and more twists and turns than he or the audience expects.

A group of holidaymakers head for the Spanish resort of Elsbels for a 4-day visit. When they get there, they find the Hotel still hasn't been finished being built, and the weather is awful. And there is something strange about the staff—they all look very similar. To top it all off, the weather seems to be having an adverse affect on the Hotel's foundations.

Professors Vooshka and Crump decide to visit an archaeological site to study the artifacts there. Lo and behold, it's right next to a caravan site where all manner of people are staying. With a randy Major owning the site, a snobbish mother, and the two professors' constant innuendos, the story ends with a sinking caravan site and a striptease performance as a replacement for the cabaret night.

Sid and Bernie keep having their amorous intentions snubbed by their girlfriends Joan and Anthea, so when they decide to take them on a holiday to Paradise Camp, they think they're off to a nudist colony—but they couldn't be more wrong, and meet up with the weirdest bunch of campers you can imagine.

This is a combination coming out and first love story. The swimmer and diver Lucard is interested in attractive Martin. The film follows the characters' coming out with all its difficulties, the bitter-sweet pleasures of first love and the dreadful moment when one comes down to reality and realizes that one's beloved friend has a hard way to go yet. The positive message the film tries to transmit is the somewhat common motto "Live each day of your life as if it were your last."

When bookseller Buzz cons Diana into thinking that his friend Stanley knows all there is to know about Africa, they are abducted and ordered to lead Diana and her henchmen to an African tribe in search of a fortune in jewels.

A member of the English upper class dies, leaving his estate and his business to an American, whom he thinks is his son who was lost as a baby and then found again. An Englishman who thinks he is an Indian comes to believe that he is actually the heir. He comes to hate the American who is his boss, his friend, and the man who has stolen the woman after whom he lusts.

Reclining on her chaise lounge in a see-through robe, Lili St. Cyr decides she needs a bubble bath. In a gilded tub fit for Marie Antoinette, she bares all that the law will allow. Then she squeezes into an evening gown and mink coat to paint the town red.

A new assignment for private detective Norman Hope: A valuable burger has been stolen from an important client. Will Norman Hope succeed in finding the stolen item? And what is the story behind the mysterious man dressed all in white who follows the investigator everywhere?

When his boss is killed, Detroit cop Axel Foley finds evidence that the murderer had ties to a California amusement park called Wonder World. Returning to sunny Beverly Hills once more, Foley reunites with Detective Billy Rosewood to solve the case. Along with Billy's new partner, Detective Jon Flint, they discover that Wonder World is being used as a front for a massive counterfeiting ring.

Steve Coogan, an arrogant actor with low self-esteem and a complicated love life, is playing the eponymous role in an adaptation of "The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman" being filmed at a stately home. He constantly spars with actor Rob Brydon, who is playing Uncle Toby and believes his role to be of equal importance to Coogan's.

Chon Wang, a clumsy imperial guard, trails Princess Pei Pei when she's kidnapped from the Forbidden City and transported to America. Wang follows her captors to Nevada, where he teams up with an unlikely partner, outcast outlaw Roy O'Bannon, and tries to spring the princess from her imprisonment.

A devout Mormon living in L.A. becomes a pornographic actor after his martial arts moves impress a big-time director.